I was in Barrancabermeja a small Colombian city, in a cheap hotel analyzing my life. I observed it as a film of failures and of cours, I ruminated about unkind comparison. My friends have always been going through the best universities in the world while I reduce to small rooms full of pale lights.
My daily experiences are just related with my professional life as auditor. I mean: Travelling day after day along the ugly country (Colombia). Waking up at 4:30 AM and sleeping at 12:00 at midnight. My anxiety has increased and my desire to keep studying is vanishing. I wanted to change the world and it finally has changed me.
One day I rembered two friends who participated in an ONG dedicated to empower young people around Climate Change. Around this topic I have been biased by teachers who stated openly that developing nations should worry about basic needs instead of low carbon development or sustainability. How wrong they were. My view changed when I helped the coordinator of climate change to diffuse the scientific products of global change in Colombia. I realized how important adaptation was to diminish financial and human catastrophes.
Therefore, I decided to write to an open message in Facebook that invited to participate in a Global Summit in Austria. I was chosen. I was in the middle of nowhere watching reptiles and dirty rivers when I opened my gmail an realized I had been lucky.
I asked for permission in my job. It was incredible it was provided. I tried to buy a ticket but it was impossible by debit card. I asked my father for help and he did. Saturday night arriving to Bogotá, in a lonely and dark room of United Airlines I was told my reservation had been cancelled. I got astonished. The story is long. Afterwards, my father bought a wrong ticket and I got by myself one in American Airlines.
I run through Miami and London airports in order to get my connection. I tolerated angry people in Florida and racist people in Austrian airport but I did it. I arrived. Men were cute, they looked kind but quite shy. Toilets did not have trash cans and they had a system I had not seen before “antisplash”.
I was told by my father to take a car that never presented in the airport; hence, I took the most expensive taxi I have taken in my life: 50 Euros. A Turkish man drove and barely understood what I asked. He told me that there were hundreds of thousands of Turkish people in Vienna. He also spoke about the visit of Vladimir Putin that forced us to take different roads to the flat where I was going to stay.
I rang the bell and a boy named B from Nepal opened the door. I went upstairs in an ancient building and when he tried to open the door he realized he had left the keys inside. I wondered: How are the doors like in South East Asia?
I learnt to take the subway in 10 minutes due to the gentleness of Austrian souls. One woman taught me to buy a ticket and another one (a Jehova witness) provided me instructions to arrive to the summit: “You go to Schottentor station and then you take the 40A bus”. She spoke about god, about Jesus, about the heart and the human beings. To be honest I was bored and I believe B too.
We arrived to the place and E laughed when she heard my story. In an uncounscious act of trust I left my bag in front of her door and traveled across the city to find the key. We run again back and tasted the relief of resting after a 24 hours trip.
We met with A, the director of the group. A kind French woman pursuing to consolidate a stronger movement. She told us the rules associated to the house, about the tidiness and the requirements to wash clothes. She came with M who had deep eyes and who randomnly came from Eugene, Oregon where Mike a man with whom I had a virtual relationship lived then. He told me he had heard about him and asked where we had met. I tried to answer but a conversation between our friends emerged.
Workshops about fund raising, conferences where teachers, experts and young representatives participated. All so pleasant but quite exhausting because I woke up every day too early and the schedule included panels until nine o’ clock in the evening.
E cooked in a motherly way the breakfast. Raspberries, blueberries, tea, bread and jam. Everything tasted delicious. Vienna looked like a fantasy world in the mornings when no one walked the streets and I run and crossed the green Danube.
I do not know if European did not like me or perhaps they tend to be more closed with their feelings. May be I am too anxious and I get quite uncomfortable with my dark jokes and my persistent conversations. Overmore I am gay I have a pheminized side that may dislike straight guys.
Days passed and my exhaustion increased. I run through Stephanplatz, I knew a gay caffe near Museumquartier where nobody spoke to me. I met an Arabian man who confessed he never had had a couple. I watched very near the artworks by Egon Schielle and I run conference after conference.
Author: Egon Schielle
A, M, J, Je and I spoke in fron of the Danube about life: “How would you be if you had what is lacking to you?”. I did not hear the answer of M. I would have liked. I do not remember what I answered. The sky was clear, the stars shining shyly and the river moving softly.
M left the next day. He went to Munich to take a flight. The group went together to the subway. M, N, S and I danced in one station typical French music. It was fun. I felt I was missing these lovely people I have just met.
I returned safely withou any issue. There were so many spiritual and lovely experiences that I can not contain in just one post. My last night was in Vienna Opera House with E. I met the heart of the Austro Hungarian empire. My soul pursued freedom.